The Madness of Repeating Patterns: Breaking Free from the Cycle of Same Actions, Different Expectations
- Dr. Wil Rodriguez
- Jul 31
- 6 min read
By Dr. Wil Rodriguez for TOCSIN Magazine
The Familiar Trap
The definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over again and expecting a different result – a quote often misattributed to Einstein but profoundly true nonetheless. This seemingly simple statement captures one of humanity’s most persistent psychological patterns: our tendency to repeat ineffective behaviors while hoping for miraculous transformations.
We see this everywhere – in relationships where we argue the same way expecting different outcomes, in careers where we apply the same strategies hoping for promotion, in personal habits where we attempt change using methods that have repeatedly failed us. Yet beneath this apparent “madness” lies a complex web of psychological mechanisms that keep us trapped in cycles of frustration and blame.
The Psychology Behind the Pattern
The Comfort Zone Paradox
A debated subject for mental health professionals, behavior therapists, and others in careers in psychology, comfort zones can both promote calm reassurance and prevent personal growth. Our comfort zones serve as psychological safe havens, providing predictability and reducing anxiety. However, they also become invisible prisons that limit our potential for growth and change.
When we remain within familiar patterns, we experience a false sense of control. The repetition feels safe, even when it’s ineffective. This creates a paradox: the very behaviors that provide psychological comfort are often the ones that prevent us from achieving our desired outcomes.
The Blame Shield
By recognising the psychological forces behind blame-shifting — whether it’s fear, cognitive dissonance, or projection — we can begin to disrupt the cycle. When our repeated actions fail to produce different results, our psychological defense mechanisms activate. Rather than examining our own role in creating unwanted outcomes, we often default to blame – blaming circumstances, other people, timing, or luck.
This blame shield serves multiple psychological functions:
It protects our self-image from the discomfort of acknowledging our contribution to problems
It maintains the illusion that we’re doing everything “right” while external forces conspire against us
It allows us to avoid the vulnerability required for genuine change
Multiple Perspectives on the Phenomenon
The Cognitive Perspective
From a cognitive standpoint, this pattern reflects several thinking errors:
Confirmation bias: We notice evidence that supports our existing approach while ignoring evidence of its ineffectiveness
Attribution errors: We attribute failures to external factors while attributing any successes to our methods
Cognitive rigidity: We become mentally inflexible, unable to consider alternative approaches
The Behavioral Perspective
Behaviorally, this pattern represents:
Learned helplessness: Past failures create a sense of powerlessness that prevents us from trying new approaches
Habit formation: Our brains default to automatic behaviors, even when they’re counterproductive
Reinforcement schedules: Occasional random successes with old methods can actually strengthen our commitment to ineffective strategies
The Emotional Perspective
Emotionally, the pattern involves:
Fear of vulnerability: Trying new approaches requires admitting our current methods aren’t working
Shame avoidance: Taking responsibility for outcomes can trigger feelings of inadequacy
Change anxiety: New behaviors feel threatening to our sense of identity and security
The Social Perspective
Socially, this manifests as:
External locus of control: Believing that outcomes are primarily determined by outside forces
Victim mentality: Positioning ourselves as powerless recipients of others’ actions
Relationship patterns: Recreating familiar dynamics even when they’re destructive
The Cost of Staying Stuck
Personal Costs
Chronic frustration and resentment
Stagnated personal growth
Reduced self-efficacy and confidence
Missed opportunities for genuine improvement
Relational Costs
Damaged relationships due to blame and lack of accountability
Repeated conflicts without resolution
Loss of trust from others who observe the pattern
Isolation from those who might offer support
Professional Costs
Career stagnation
Reduced credibility and influence
Missed promotions and opportunities
Workplace conflict and tension
Breaking Free: Tools and Strategies
1. The STOP-LOOK-CHOOSE Method
STOP: When you notice frustration with repeated poor outcomes, pause before automatically blaming external factors or repeating the same approach.
LOOK: Examine your role honestly:
What specific actions have you been taking?
What has been your emotional state during these actions?
What assumptions have you been operating under?
What evidence contradicts your current approach?
CHOOSE: Consciously select a different response:
Identify one specific behavior you could change
Consider how you might approach the situation if you were a different person
Ask yourself: “What would someone who gets different results do here?”
2. The Responsibility Audit
Create a detailed inventory of a challenging situation:
My Direct Actions: List specific behaviors, decisions, and communications you’ve contributed
My Indirect Influences: Identify your emotional state, assumptions, and energy you’ve brought to the situation
External Factors: Acknowledge genuinely outside influences
Learning Opportunities: Identify what you could do differently
This tool helps distinguish between taking responsibility (empowering) and taking blame (disempowering).
3. The Comfort Zone Expansion Protocol
Mindset shifts required to step outside your comfort zone into a growth zone involve systematic expansion of your behavioral repertoire:
Week 1–2: Identify your current pattern and its boundaries
Week 3–4: Make small modifications to your approach (10% different)
Week 5–6: Implement moderate changes (25% different)
Week 7–8: Try significantly different approaches (50% different)
Track results objectively, without judgment, to gather data about what actually works.
4. The Alternative Action Generator
When facing a familiar challenge:
Write down your typical response
Generate 5 completely different approaches (don’t judge feasibility yet)
Consider what someone you admire would do
Ask: “What would the opposite of my usual approach look like?”
Select the alternative that feels 70% comfortable (challenging but not overwhelming)
5. The Outcome Ownership Practice
Daily reflection questions:
“How did my actions today contribute to my results?”
“What did I do that moved me toward my goals?”
“What did I do that moved me away from my goals?”
“What could I do differently tomorrow?”
This practice builds the muscle of personal responsibility without self-judgment.
Advanced Strategies for Persistent Patterns
The Pattern Interrupt Technique
When you catch yourself beginning the familiar sequence:
Physically change your position or environment
Take three deep breaths
Ask: “Is this the same thing I’ve done before?”
If yes, commit to doing literally anything else for the next five minutes
The Perspective Shift Framework
Consider your situation from multiple viewpoints:
How would a mentor see this?
What would someone who loves me advise?
How would someone who consistently gets good results approach this?
What would I tell my best friend if they described this exact situation?
The Experimental Mindset
Approach change as a scientist:
Form hypotheses about what might work
Design small experiments to test new approaches
Collect data objectively
Adjust based on results, not emotions
The Path Forward
Breaking free from the cycle of repeated actions and blamed outcomes requires courage, honesty, and persistence. Taking away the blame without taking away the responsibility keeps us accountable to ourselves and the world around us without setting us up for shame and devaluation.
The goal isn’t to achieve perfection or to eliminate all external challenges. Instead, it’s to develop the capacity to respond differently when our current approaches aren’t working. This requires:
Honest self-assessment: Regularly examining our contributions to outcomes
Emotional resilience: Tolerating the discomfort of trying new approaches
Growth mindset: Viewing challenges as opportunities to develop new capabilities
Systematic approach: Using structured methods to identify and implement changes
Conclusion
The “madness” of expecting different results from the same actions isn’t really about mental illness – it’s about being human. We all have tendencies toward comfort, familiarity, and self-protection that can keep us stuck in ineffective patterns. The difference between those who remain trapped and those who break free lies not in innate ability, but in willingness to honestly examine their role in creating their results and courageously try different approaches.
Change is possible at any moment, but it requires us to step out of our comfort zones, take responsibility for our outcomes, and experiment with new ways of being. The tools and frameworks provided here offer concrete steps toward breaking free from cycles of frustration and blame, opening the door to genuine transformation and growth.
Remember: if you want different results, you must be willing to take different actions. The power to change your outcomes lies not in changing others or circumstances, but in changing yourself. That’s not the easy path, but it’s the only path that actually works.
Reflection Box
By Dr. Wil Rodríguez
This article isn’t about theory—it’s about lived patterns I’ve observed, coached through, and broken myself. I know what it feels like to cling to familiar dysfunctions out of fear that the unknown might be worse. But I’ve also seen what happens when we dare to try different, dare to own our role, and dare to stop the loop.
You are not alone in the repetition. And you are not powerless to change it.
Start with one decision. That’s where transformation begins.
✦ Join the Conversation at TOCSIN Magazine
Looking for writing that challenges your beliefs, awakens your leadership, and invites you to become more of who you really are?
Become a member of TOCSIN Magazine and engage with deep, meaningful content that doesn’t just inform—it transforms.
🜃 Visit tocsinmag.com and take your place in the new dialogue.