Between Giving and Taking, Life Slips Away

A reflection on broken promises, emotional debt, and the silence we leave behind

By Dr. Wil Rodríguez

There are two essential movements that define the human experience:

Giving and Taking.

Every day, consciously or not, we are doing one or the other.

We give love, time, help, presence.

We take attention, energy, space, even people’s silence.

But something fundamental gets lost in that binary:

We forget how to share.

We forget that love, life, and meaning are not just about giving or taking —

but about co-creating.

The Invisible Currency: Promises and Requests

Human relationships are built on requests and promises.

You ask, I promise.

I need, you vow.

And when those promises are not fulfilled — when I give and you don’t, or you take and never return —

something begins to break, quietly and slowly.

Sometimes we give too much and lose ourselves.

Sometimes we take too much and lose others.

And sometimes, we get stuck in the imbalance,

forgetting that the purpose was never to win…

but to connect.

The Lie of Time

We assume there will be time.

To say what needs to be said.

To fix what was broken.

To return what we borrowed — emotionally or otherwise.

But time isn’t a guarantee.

Time is a vanishing window.

And the deeper tragedy isn’t just death.

It’s regret.

It’s what we didn’t say.

What we didn’t do.

What we didn’t give back.

What we never shared.

Naomi and Derek: A Giver and a Taker

Naomi spent her life giving. She gave her energy, her loyalty, her silence. She gave to survive, to keep peace, to feel worthy.

She lost herself little by little — not to violence, but to invisible erosion.

Derek lived by taking. He absorbed love, time, and care without returning it. He used people’s affection like fuel and left them empty.

Neither of them meant harm.

But both lived in extremes — one erasing herself to feel useful, the other consuming others to feel whole.

And both paid the same price: isolation.

Because neither ever learned to share.

The Cost of Imbalance

When we only give, we disappear.

When we only take, we destroy.

And when we do both without sharing — we suffer in silence.

We:

• Tolerate things that aren’t love.

• Confuse survival with intimacy.

• Perform generosity while secretly hoping to be rescued.

• Abandon ourselves while blaming others for not saving us.

We live between unfulfilled promises and unspoken expectations,

and we lose time — real, precious, non-refundable time —

hoping the other person will one day get it.

The Forgotten Power of Sharing

To share is to say:

“I’m not giving you all of me so I can disappear.”

“I’m not taking from you so I can avoid myself.”

“I want to meet you where we both exist — honestly, presently, equally.”

Sharing is the middle ground that doesn’t cancel you out.

It doesn’t empty you.

It doesn’t owe.

It holds.

When we learn to share, we don’t just stay in connection —

we honor it.

Final Wake-Up Call

Between giving and taking…

between promising and forgetting…

between speaking and staying silent…

life quietly slips away.

Not in explosions, but in little delays.

In broken commitments.

In relationships that look whole on the outside but are hollow on the inside.

Naomi gave until she vanished.

Derek took until he was alone.

But neither of them knew how to share the moment, the truth, the now.

And maybe that’s what this is really about:

Not what we give.

Not what we take.

But what we miss — when we live without urgency, without honesty, and without the courage to meet each other halfway.

Ask Yourself:

• Am I giving to be loved… or to avoid being alone?

• Am I taking to feel powerful… or because I’m afraid to feel vulnerable?

• Am I sharing — or just keeping score?

The Reminder

Time doesn’t pause.

Love doesn’t wait.

The people who matter won’t be here forever.

So stop waiting to return that call.

Stop delaying that apology.

Stop storing up love like it’s a secret.

Share it.

Speak it.

Live it.

Because between giving and taking…

the only thing worth keeping

is the moment you were fully, fearlessly,

present.

If you resonate with this message, don’t forget to stay with us at Tocsin Magazine.

There’s more to awaken, more to share, and more to say — before time slips away.